Everyone wants and needs to be loved by others. However, before we gain love from others, we need to love ourselves.
When I recall early years in my life, from the primary school all the way up to the university, I find there was always someone who was not brilliant or outstanding but could catch eyes of many other people. They were not distinguished by high marks or pretty faces but rather a charming quality which was released from every expression and movement. Usually, they are confident, friendly, humorous and generous and they are activists in school activities. People feel comfortable and happy when being with them. I think the reason for those people being attractive is that they love themselves or in other words, they are happy and satisfied with who they are. So they usually stay optimistic in life which has positive influence on people around them. Thus, people love them for the refreshing and pleasant feeling they bring.
Then it comes to my mind that there are also some people who were always forgot and isolated by the group. In most cases, they did not speak much or join any club or activity. And when they were asked to answer questions in the class, they would blush and speak in a low voice. Besides, they appeared cautious and would swallow insults from others which indicated that they were self-contemptuous and felt inferior to others. For me, I think their problem lies in the lack of self-love. They did not love themselves due to some weakness, for example, bad-looking appearance or limited intelligence. Hence, they left people with the impression that they were pessimistic, unmotivated and unfriendly. As nobody wanted to make friend with such kind of people, they stayed lonely and felt even worse about themselves.
However, the fact is that no one is perfect. Those who were popular had defects, too. The difference is that self-loved people can see their strength and use it while avoiding the weakness but the people who do not love themselves focus too much on their weakness and forget their strength. If they see the strength and think highly of it, they will start to love themselves, too. We are who we are. It is impossible for us to change into someone else. So is it better if we love ourselves and lead a happy life instead of looking down upon ourselves and stay sad?
what you said is quite true. i used to think the girls who are always the focus among the crowd,just benifit from their beauty. but i have realised that people like them not because of their appearance, for appearance cannot guarantee a long good impression, but because of their inner beauty.
ReplyDeleteTo be honest, I do not totally agree with you. I think being isolated is good in certain cases because it blesses you with more personal space and free time to think about life over and throughly. That is why scientists are in the isolated points.
ReplyDeleteEveryone in the world may have their own defects. These are not something that we must feel ashamed or self-contemptuous.We should not shirk, we should directly face them instead. When a person can face his own defects, then I believe he can improve himself in the future.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you that one has to love oneself before others can love him/her. Usually, we tend to be our worst critic and we tend to be harsh towards ourself.
ReplyDeleteit is true that someone who wants to be loved but never try to love others cannot understand the meaning of love. to love means to give, sometimes even mean to sacrifice, but it is through loving others that one can truly understand the meaning of love.
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